I'm late, I'm late, for a very important....

I have a date tonight. Last week, I spent some time with old friends of mine- turns out there was someone a little more interested than just being friendly. I will say I have some reluctance in writing so personally; you never really know who is reading your heart. However, I have always been a promoter of honesty and integrity, and if I can't say it to them, I shouldn't share it with the world.

For all intents and purposes, we'll call him A. I've known A for a few years, but never thought of any sort of possibility of anything more than friendship because I've never felt he was romantically interested. Apparently, he is. I am not sure where I want it to go, or if it is going anywhere at all- but I don't want to guess. This time, I just want to take what is coming to me.

At the same time, part of my heart belongs to someone else- even though he can't be responsible for it right now. We'll call him B. B has become an amazing friend. A person I truly admire; admiration does not come to easily to me. I feel safe with him. Safe and Happy. However, I am having a hard time writing the next sentence because it starts with BUT. BUT, the timing isn't right. I like my job, BUT it doesn't pay the bills. I want to go on vacation, BUT I'm not willing to take out the time. Ugh...BUT. I obviously have some feelings I've not quite accepted, can you tell?

My recent goal, having started to pick up in dating again, is to take my time and relax. Do what feels right and continue from there. I want to say that I wish it was easier, but I think I'm starting to welcome the challenges.